Sober Second Thoughts: About hate

I hate Manchester United. There, I said it. As an honest to Goodness j-school trained sports journalist I should be ashamed to admit that, but I can’t deny it. I’m pretty convinced that when the world comes to an end the whole episode will start immediately after Alex Ferguson flashes his horns. That will be the signal.

I hate site of their stupid red strips. I especially hate the sight of those stupid red kits on 22-year-old frat boys in downtown Toronto. I really hate it when those frat boys have “Hargreaves” written on the back (and I especially hate Hargreaves himself).

I hate that there are always 200 minutes of stoppage time when they are trailing and I hate that it’s never their fault when they lose.

I don’t hate their money, but I hate the fact that so much of it is earned off the backs of screaming Asian girls. I hate that many of their post-99, born-on-third-thought-they-hit-a-triple fans are dismissive of the history and traditions of other clubs that don’t win everything, every year.

I especially hate the twits who hang the 33-years banner (really? Is it necessary? And I thought you didn’t care about City) and I hate that they are always the feature game on TV.

Have I mentioned how much I HATE Alex Ferguson?

I suppose I’m a lesser person for this (or more evolved. It’s hard to say), but without hate in football we would not have love. It’s the ying to the yang of support and every bit as valuable to the sport’s popularity as ultra-style support. Yes, hate – real, violent hate – is not good and has caused problems in the sport throughout the years. But, that’s not the same kind of hate.

When the West Boys Ootras take on Main Street Bad Boys in a street brawl down by the Tube they aren’t fighting because they hate the other football club. They are fighting because they are hateful, period. No, we are talking about football hate.

Football hate is really about begrudging respect (except I don’t respect United. I hate those bastards). And it helps to provide the edge that makes watching this sport so damn addictive.

So, embrace your hate. It’s for the better good, after all.

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